I haven't updated in a long while, huh?
When it comes to blogs, I like to have daily updates. Unfortunately, I have been indulging myself in fanfictions festooned with pages among pages of Seto Kaiba and Katsuya Jounouchi yaoi. I must say, that pairing has grown on me over the past few days, but I still adore the Seto and Kouga crossover couple. <3
So, today was pretty awesome. I woke up earlier than usual and went to work outside with Dad instantly. We were trimming some overgrown foliage, raking, scooping, chainsawing, and so on and so forth. You know, yard work. We threw a cat on Lucy a couple times, enjoyed watching the yellow bellied finches bitch at each other and eat seeds, and a lot of other stuff!
At about 2:45 pm or so we called it quits to eat and take showers to get ready for drum lessons. Before we arrived at the studio, though, we went and got some mochas. I dared to have an add shot...and now...I am so hyper. While with Phil I was pretty darn hyper. I would have random splurges (I guess you could say) of energy, but a bit of my shy self still shone through my "drunk" exterior.
I accidentally bled on Phil's bass kick, too. I felt so dumb! I had been using the kick wrong lately for some reason or other, and the kick would rub against my skin on my leg. So while I was playing today, I started to bleed and there was enough blood to soak through my pant leg. Haha! It was funny, though. And, of course, Phil wasn't angry or disappointed or anything. He was just surprised because he had never had anyone "injured" during lessons.
We got to play together again, too. Woah...that sounded dirty. What I mean is: we got to JAM together again. He was playing the congas and I was on the drum set again. It was so much fun! Being with Phil helps me to feel better about everything.
Now I am home...typing away with my lovely sister pestering me somewhat. I still haven't cleaned up my bloody leg, either. Hah!
Oh em gee!
I was, like, watering and feeding, you know? And I had to pee SO BAD because of that damn mocha! So I was dancing around with the hose like an idiot. Finally I just kicked off my shoes and ran...SPRINTED...to the house. I burst through the door (almost died) and disappeared. When I came out, Dad was all "What the hell are you doin?"
Good times.
Ooooh! And EARLIER earlier I managed to do...A HAND STAND. I was amazed. I was...bewildered. I chickened out though and fell back down because I didn't wanna break my neck. I'm such a wuss!
Uuhg...there was something else I wanted to add, but I can't remember at the moment. It annoys me so much when you suddenly forget what you wanted to say...evil!
Crap. I can't remember. When it comes I'll probably rant about it in my next entry.
IN FACT, there has been some misfortune recently. I didn't want to kill the mood by mentioning it...so expect an update on that by my next entry.
School is going good (though I might get a poor grade in etiquette LOL).
Haven't been drawing as much again.
Been very distant to almost everyone outside my family.
Lada dee, lada dum, lada dee da doo
I have no drive to type.
I should consider cleaning off this dried blood soon.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Spitting Blood
I've been neglecting daily events for a couple of days now.
I'll try to catch up with my own life in this entry.
The day I visited the dentist to receive my upper retainer my comic book came in the mail (no UPS man lol). So I finally got to read the entire first volume of the Stray Crayons manga! It was awesome. It's smaller than I imagined, too. The pages are so delicate that it doesn't even look like a 100+ page manga. I adore it so very much, though!
I've caught up a little bit on my homework, but I had to give up on a lot of it and just do everything I receive now. My grade will be hurt, but I'm going to boost it back up. I've finally gotten myself to do my homework earlier on in the week. In fact, I am working on Economics at this very moment.
Grandma brought over an old sewing kit for me to have. She said she heard I was taking a sewing class soon, so she wondered if I would like to have it. I believe it was either her mother's kit or her grandmother's. But it was so sweet of her! I couldn't stop thanking the woman.
As you have noticed, I've been messing around more with photography than with drawing. I think it's just a random phase, though; I'll probably be over it soon. Besides, drawing is so much more amusing! To me anyways.
Just the other day my sister and I were reciting a duet while washing dishes. I had a notebook with the song pasted in it and we sang it over and over. It was hilarious. The song is It's Tough To Be A God from the movie The Road to El Dorado. I sing as Miguel and Hay sings as Tulio. It's the greatest song ever. Also, we're thinking of learning the song from The Quest for Camelot that Devon and Cornwall sing. It's the one that goes "If I didn't have you!" Haha. So amusing.
So, Cookie HAS been watching her kittens. And there's quite a few of them. While I was outside earlier I managed to spot them wrestling and exploring. I dubbed the little gray striped one a "Mama's Boy" 'cause it was continuously with Cookie rubbing on her and meowing. It was cute, though! I'm glad the kittens are doing well...even though they'll become wild, mean bastards.
I'm a bit angry with myself today.
For one, I woke up late. Rather, I woke up and layed around. I had a lot on my mind because of some dreams I had. The one I had first I won't mention. But the second one was...weird...
Like, in the second dream I woke up from my first dream. It felt SO real. I got up to brush my teeth for the morning. It was pretty dark, too. So, there I was, brushing my teeth. When I spit I noticed a weird color in my soapy saliva. It looked darker. I realized then that I was practically puking out blood. I continued to brush and spit though, watching the blood mix in with the water and disappear down the drain. I tried to find a cut or something in my mouth but couldn't find anything. Then I woke up.
I'm pretty sure that's how it went. That's all I remember of it. Haha
But that dream isn't a part of why I am angry with myself.
Because of the first dream I have been a depressed bum. I pretty much sat around like a vegetable...just thinking. There was so much I wanted to do, but I just didn't have the drive. I felt so pathetic.
I'm feeling a little better right now, though. So yay.
I think that pretty much sums it up.
For now at least.
I'm sure there's more, but I can't think clearly right now.
Oh!
Hay and I might be doing some random photoshoots soon. lol
I'll try to catch up with my own life in this entry.
The day I visited the dentist to receive my upper retainer my comic book came in the mail (no UPS man lol). So I finally got to read the entire first volume of the Stray Crayons manga! It was awesome. It's smaller than I imagined, too. The pages are so delicate that it doesn't even look like a 100+ page manga. I adore it so very much, though!
I've caught up a little bit on my homework, but I had to give up on a lot of it and just do everything I receive now. My grade will be hurt, but I'm going to boost it back up. I've finally gotten myself to do my homework earlier on in the week. In fact, I am working on Economics at this very moment.
Grandma brought over an old sewing kit for me to have. She said she heard I was taking a sewing class soon, so she wondered if I would like to have it. I believe it was either her mother's kit or her grandmother's. But it was so sweet of her! I couldn't stop thanking the woman.
As you have noticed, I've been messing around more with photography than with drawing. I think it's just a random phase, though; I'll probably be over it soon. Besides, drawing is so much more amusing! To me anyways.
Just the other day my sister and I were reciting a duet while washing dishes. I had a notebook with the song pasted in it and we sang it over and over. It was hilarious. The song is It's Tough To Be A God from the movie The Road to El Dorado. I sing as Miguel and Hay sings as Tulio. It's the greatest song ever. Also, we're thinking of learning the song from The Quest for Camelot that Devon and Cornwall sing. It's the one that goes "If I didn't have you!" Haha. So amusing.
So, Cookie HAS been watching her kittens. And there's quite a few of them. While I was outside earlier I managed to spot them wrestling and exploring. I dubbed the little gray striped one a "Mama's Boy" 'cause it was continuously with Cookie rubbing on her and meowing. It was cute, though! I'm glad the kittens are doing well...even though they'll become wild, mean bastards.
I'm a bit angry with myself today.
For one, I woke up late. Rather, I woke up and layed around. I had a lot on my mind because of some dreams I had. The one I had first I won't mention. But the second one was...weird...
Like, in the second dream I woke up from my first dream. It felt SO real. I got up to brush my teeth for the morning. It was pretty dark, too. So, there I was, brushing my teeth. When I spit I noticed a weird color in my soapy saliva. It looked darker. I realized then that I was practically puking out blood. I continued to brush and spit though, watching the blood mix in with the water and disappear down the drain. I tried to find a cut or something in my mouth but couldn't find anything. Then I woke up.
I'm pretty sure that's how it went. That's all I remember of it. Haha
But that dream isn't a part of why I am angry with myself.
Because of the first dream I have been a depressed bum. I pretty much sat around like a vegetable...just thinking. There was so much I wanted to do, but I just didn't have the drive. I felt so pathetic.
I'm feeling a little better right now, though. So yay.
I think that pretty much sums it up.
For now at least.
I'm sure there's more, but I can't think clearly right now.
Oh!
Hay and I might be doing some random photoshoots soon. lol
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Jesus Lizard
You know you're cool when your neighbor is a fourth degree black belt.
And you know you're even cooler when your neighbor who is a fourth degree black belt has his son in Karate, too.
Oh yeah!
My little neighbor was over just a few minutes ago showing us some karate moves and his new orange belt. He is so cute sometimes. :)
Drum lessons today was rather humorous; a lot of fun, too. Phil was asking me if I had ever heard someone breathe in and talk at the same time. He kindly did a swell demonstration of it! So, during practice, (while trying to concentrate) he randomly breathes in and talks.
"I heard that," I told him, laughing.
"I knew it would make you laugh," he said.
Ah, Phil. Such a funny guy.
We even jammed together for a few minutes before our time was up. He was on the congas and I played with his drum set. Great time!
I also managed to steal some more random shots of random things around outside while I was feeding and watering. I'll be posting my favorites on my DeviantArt account, so go and check them out there. ^_~
Basically,
when I take a step back,
life is swell as of today. I'm quite satisfied.
Also, I started my homework early. THANK CAZIC.
And you know you're even cooler when your neighbor who is a fourth degree black belt has his son in Karate, too.
Oh yeah!
My little neighbor was over just a few minutes ago showing us some karate moves and his new orange belt. He is so cute sometimes. :)
Drum lessons today was rather humorous; a lot of fun, too. Phil was asking me if I had ever heard someone breathe in and talk at the same time. He kindly did a swell demonstration of it! So, during practice, (while trying to concentrate) he randomly breathes in and talks.
"I heard that," I told him, laughing.
"I knew it would make you laugh," he said.
Ah, Phil. Such a funny guy.
We even jammed together for a few minutes before our time was up. He was on the congas and I played with his drum set. Great time!
I also managed to steal some more random shots of random things around outside while I was feeding and watering. I'll be posting my favorites on my DeviantArt account, so go and check them out there. ^_~
Basically,
when I take a step back,
life is swell as of today. I'm quite satisfied.
Also, I started my homework early. THANK CAZIC.
ZOMG It's a Jesus Lizard
Monday, September 22, 2008
Photography
I've managed to get a few shots of some of our cats here on the ranchette. Unfortunately I could not manage to steal any moments of the little grey striped kitten or his mother, Cookie. I did get some of Kiwi, Finn, Chin, and the little black and white kitten, though. :)
The other day I got some shots of Chin playing with a curtain.
My current wallpaper:
While I was watering yesterday, I also got some shots of nature. Behold my amateur skills.
And just for fun~my sex kittens! I mean...action figures! -shot-
( Marik's head is a bit... o_o; I guess that's what happens when your little cousin abuses his toys... <<;; )
The other day I got some shots of Chin playing with a curtain. 
My current wallpaper:
While I was watering yesterday, I also got some shots of nature. Behold my amateur skills.
And just for fun~my sex kittens! I mean...action figures! -shot-
( Marik's head is a bit... o_o; I guess that's what happens when your little cousin abuses his toys... <<;; )
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Painting with Dad. ^_^
Sanding shelves : )
You know you kick ass when your dog can fly.
Me and my sister's necklaces. :)Saturday, September 20, 2008
Nodding Off...
Aaah, where have the daily updates run off to?
I'm too tired to type out anything, eh, lively at the moment. But I shall share at least some details about today. Well, with all honesty...today was just another day. I should have been working on my homework, but again my rebellious teenager self wanted to screw around rather than do what's important. Shame on me. So, basically, I'll be doing homework all day tomorrow. By now I should have learned my lesson, no?
Oh! On the more positive side of things, I found the cord for Mom's camera. I'll be posting some pictures to share with my few readers soon. :)
Okay, I need to go to bed now.
G'night, mates!
I'm too tired to type out anything, eh, lively at the moment. But I shall share at least some details about today. Well, with all honesty...today was just another day. I should have been working on my homework, but again my rebellious teenager self wanted to screw around rather than do what's important. Shame on me. So, basically, I'll be doing homework all day tomorrow. By now I should have learned my lesson, no?
Oh! On the more positive side of things, I found the cord for Mom's camera. I'll be posting some pictures to share with my few readers soon. :)
Okay, I need to go to bed now.
G'night, mates!
Friday, September 19, 2008
Tape Shortage
Another morning post.
I just wanted to tell the tale of my retainer almost getting thrown away.
Well, it pretty much did get thrown away, but it was saved!
Anyways, yesterday I had wrapped it up in a napkin while I was eating lunch. It wasn't exactly a smart move on my part.
See, I usually would wrap my retainer in a napkin. If someone were to pick it up then they'd feel that something was inside of it. I've done it a few times before and there were never any agonizing results. Well, last night, while gathering the garbage for Garbage Night...it must've gotten mixed in with the trash.
At first I was like "Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit," but I knew where it would be. I decided to 'sticker' (there was no tape) a note to the door for Dad. I didn't want him to go and dig for my retainer, it was just to let him know and have him wake me up so I could go and fetch the damn thing before the garbage man came. Well, knowing my kind hearted and generous father, he went across the street and hauled the trash can over here. He had started to look for my missing retainer, but had to leave for work shortly. But it was so nice of him to look!
Thankfully, when I got up finally, I grabbed the bag that Dad and I figured the retainer would have most likely wound up in, opened it, dug a little through the trash, and ta-da! I am so thankful that my little bastard of a retainer was there.
I'm getting my upper retainer today at the dentist, so what would I have said when I showed up without my lower? Hah!
Basically, everything is fine now. I hauled the garbage can back across the street, explained to Grandma what happened when she came outside asking me what I was doing with the garbage, hung out with her for a bit, then came back home.
I shall never put my retainer in a napkin again!
Lesson learned.
Other than that,
My love for the KougaxSeto pairing has led me to 'manipulate' some screen shots. Oh, yes. I went there.
I've done better but I'm a bit too lazy at the moment to pull of anything fancy-pancy. Enjoyeth at thy own pleasureth. <3
I just wanted to tell the tale of my retainer almost getting thrown away.
Well, it pretty much did get thrown away, but it was saved!
Anyways, yesterday I had wrapped it up in a napkin while I was eating lunch. It wasn't exactly a smart move on my part.
See, I usually would wrap my retainer in a napkin. If someone were to pick it up then they'd feel that something was inside of it. I've done it a few times before and there were never any agonizing results. Well, last night, while gathering the garbage for Garbage Night...it must've gotten mixed in with the trash.
At first I was like "Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit," but I knew where it would be. I decided to 'sticker' (there was no tape) a note to the door for Dad. I didn't want him to go and dig for my retainer, it was just to let him know and have him wake me up so I could go and fetch the damn thing before the garbage man came. Well, knowing my kind hearted and generous father, he went across the street and hauled the trash can over here. He had started to look for my missing retainer, but had to leave for work shortly. But it was so nice of him to look!
Thankfully, when I got up finally, I grabbed the bag that Dad and I figured the retainer would have most likely wound up in, opened it, dug a little through the trash, and ta-da! I am so thankful that my little bastard of a retainer was there.
I'm getting my upper retainer today at the dentist, so what would I have said when I showed up without my lower? Hah!
Basically, everything is fine now. I hauled the garbage can back across the street, explained to Grandma what happened when she came outside asking me what I was doing with the garbage, hung out with her for a bit, then came back home.
I shall never put my retainer in a napkin again!
Lesson learned.
Other than that,
My love for the KougaxSeto pairing has led me to 'manipulate' some screen shots. Oh, yes. I went there.
I've done better but I'm a bit too lazy at the moment to pull of anything fancy-pancy. Enjoyeth at thy own pleasureth. <3
Thursday, September 18, 2008
FURI KURI!
So, a lot has happened today. Unfortunately I don't exact amount of motivation to type out everything in grand and/or inspiring detail. Shame on me.
To begin my day,
I got my lazy ass out of bed around seven am to go with Dad to see his doctor. On the way we snatched some mocha, got lost, but finally made it to the place. So, while Dad was getting his check up, I sat in the waiting room reading this really interesting article about York in England. It's said to be the most haunted or something. I really did enjoy reading it. I have a thing for apparitions and poltergeists and spirits and what not. If you want to check it out look for the National Geographics magazine of October 2008. It's totally worth the read!
Fabulous news: Dad is as healthy as a horse! In other words, he is pretty much in perfect condition.
After the doctor's, we made our way to a shopping location where this shoe store was that Dad's doctor recommended. You see, Dad's feet have been bothering him, and this place called Shoes that Fit was supposed to help out. The place didn't open until ten am, so we waddled around the shopping center (everything was closed). When the store did open though, it was great. We were instantly greeted by Abel (who I think might be the store manager). He didn't hesitate to help us out. Something random: while Dad was talking with Abel, a purse fell off of its shelf next to me. Amusing, no? Anyways, there was this cool...thingy...that was at the back of the store. It was something you stepped on and the pressure of your feet, your foot size, and a lot of other stuff about your feet would appear on the computer screen. It was totally cool! I sometimes forget how technology advanced our civilization is anymore. After Dad tried it, Abel asked if I wanted to. I didn't hesitate! After some more shoe searching and interesting explanations, Dad finally purchased a really nice pair...for $159.99. The special pads for his feet: $69.99. Woah...but, I must say, the customer service was fantastic!
On the way home to load up our cardboard, I was talking to Dad about how everything good for you is expensive, whereas everything bad for you is cheap. It's really lame, I think. Dad said "Yeah, the rich and wealthy are the ones who're healthy." Then he smirked at his rhyme. Hah!
Oh...my...Cazic...
The cardboard...stuffed the bed of Dad's truck. It was rediculous! As soon as I find the USB cord thingy for Mom's camera, I'll post the pictures for you. To me and Dad...it was epic. Dad was dissapointed that we weren't getting a lot of stares as we were on our way to the recycling center. It was funny, though! Oh, and for a pound of cardboard you get one cent. Hah! So, for all of our cardboard we got $11. Better than nothing! But, in total, (which includes the bottles and cans and what not), we left with $53.43. Sweet.
On the way home we dropped by Wal*Mart to purchase a new coffe maker for Dad. His other broke, so every time we saw a Mr. Coffee machine, he called it something like "Mr. Crappy." Hehe. When he was satisfied with one he found, I asked if would could see if we could find a miniature maniqune (my old one broke). Alas, we couldn't find the damn things. That Wal*Mart is a little unfamiliar to us...and none of what I wanted was in the arts and crafts section. So we gave up and left. On the way home we got some In n Out Burger (Dad's FAVORITE). There were two cute guys there! Hah! Too bad I'm interested in the female species. Then we had to drop by Taco Bell to get Hay three taco supremes. She called earlier, dying of hunger as usual. Silly girl.
After that, I basically did my daily chores, relaxed, squeezed in like one minute of skateboarding time (I love to skateboard!), blah, blah. Saw the catapillar Hay found, named it Steve, and set it free, blah, blah. Redownloaded 2Moons, but it's still weird. Blah, blah. Saved a "moth" from Chin, but discovered as soon as I opened my hand that it was a prayingmantis, showed it to everyone, set it free, faced 'abandoment' issues because I miss my prayingmantis, took a shower, and now I'm here.
God, I can't blog tonight! There's a lot, yeah, but I'm sure I missed a bunch of good, juicy stuff. If I think of 'em...I'll probably be posting them or editing this entry. I just can't seem...to...type so well...or something...I don't know.
But, all in all, I would have to say that today was fantabulous!
Oh! I was chasing Haley and she slipped, saved her hip from colliding with the counter, but hit her head on the counter beam...poor girl. Everytime I think about it I wanna burst out laughing. Haha! We were pretty...roudy today. Maybe 'cause we were both hyper. We kept tackling each other and chasing the animals...wtf.
<3
And David from that shoe place let me keep a piece of..."genuine sheepskin." Hah!
Also, sorry if there is anything mispelled and what not. I'm tired and spell check isn't working. Blah.
<3 <3 <3
Seto x Kouga foreveeeeeeeeeeer.
To begin my day,
I got my lazy ass out of bed around seven am to go with Dad to see his doctor. On the way we snatched some mocha, got lost, but finally made it to the place. So, while Dad was getting his check up, I sat in the waiting room reading this really interesting article about York in England. It's said to be the most haunted or something. I really did enjoy reading it. I have a thing for apparitions and poltergeists and spirits and what not. If you want to check it out look for the National Geographics magazine of October 2008. It's totally worth the read!
Fabulous news: Dad is as healthy as a horse! In other words, he is pretty much in perfect condition.
After the doctor's, we made our way to a shopping location where this shoe store was that Dad's doctor recommended. You see, Dad's feet have been bothering him, and this place called Shoes that Fit was supposed to help out. The place didn't open until ten am, so we waddled around the shopping center (everything was closed). When the store did open though, it was great. We were instantly greeted by Abel (who I think might be the store manager). He didn't hesitate to help us out. Something random: while Dad was talking with Abel, a purse fell off of its shelf next to me. Amusing, no? Anyways, there was this cool...thingy...that was at the back of the store. It was something you stepped on and the pressure of your feet, your foot size, and a lot of other stuff about your feet would appear on the computer screen. It was totally cool! I sometimes forget how technology advanced our civilization is anymore. After Dad tried it, Abel asked if I wanted to. I didn't hesitate! After some more shoe searching and interesting explanations, Dad finally purchased a really nice pair...for $159.99. The special pads for his feet: $69.99. Woah...but, I must say, the customer service was fantastic!
On the way home to load up our cardboard, I was talking to Dad about how everything good for you is expensive, whereas everything bad for you is cheap. It's really lame, I think. Dad said "Yeah, the rich and wealthy are the ones who're healthy." Then he smirked at his rhyme. Hah!
Oh...my...Cazic...
The cardboard...stuffed the bed of Dad's truck. It was rediculous! As soon as I find the USB cord thingy for Mom's camera, I'll post the pictures for you. To me and Dad...it was epic. Dad was dissapointed that we weren't getting a lot of stares as we were on our way to the recycling center. It was funny, though! Oh, and for a pound of cardboard you get one cent. Hah! So, for all of our cardboard we got $11. Better than nothing! But, in total, (which includes the bottles and cans and what not), we left with $53.43. Sweet.
On the way home we dropped by Wal*Mart to purchase a new coffe maker for Dad. His other broke, so every time we saw a Mr. Coffee machine, he called it something like "Mr. Crappy." Hehe. When he was satisfied with one he found, I asked if would could see if we could find a miniature maniqune (my old one broke). Alas, we couldn't find the damn things. That Wal*Mart is a little unfamiliar to us...and none of what I wanted was in the arts and crafts section. So we gave up and left. On the way home we got some In n Out Burger (Dad's FAVORITE). There were two cute guys there! Hah! Too bad I'm interested in the female species. Then we had to drop by Taco Bell to get Hay three taco supremes. She called earlier, dying of hunger as usual. Silly girl.
After that, I basically did my daily chores, relaxed, squeezed in like one minute of skateboarding time (I love to skateboard!), blah, blah. Saw the catapillar Hay found, named it Steve, and set it free, blah, blah. Redownloaded 2Moons, but it's still weird. Blah, blah. Saved a "moth" from Chin, but discovered as soon as I opened my hand that it was a prayingmantis, showed it to everyone, set it free, faced 'abandoment' issues because I miss my prayingmantis, took a shower, and now I'm here.
God, I can't blog tonight! There's a lot, yeah, but I'm sure I missed a bunch of good, juicy stuff. If I think of 'em...I'll probably be posting them or editing this entry. I just can't seem...to...type so well...or something...I don't know.
But, all in all, I would have to say that today was fantabulous!
Oh! I was chasing Haley and she slipped, saved her hip from colliding with the counter, but hit her head on the counter beam...poor girl. Everytime I think about it I wanna burst out laughing. Haha! We were pretty...roudy today. Maybe 'cause we were both hyper. We kept tackling each other and chasing the animals...wtf.
<3
And David from that shoe place let me keep a piece of..."genuine sheepskin." Hah!
Also, sorry if there is anything mispelled and what not. I'm tired and spell check isn't working. Blah.
<3 <3 <3
Seto x Kouga foreveeeeeeeeeeer.
Wolf and Dragon
I think that I might be the only fangirl of the anime/manga crossover couple KougaxSeto (Kouga from Inuyasha, Seto from YuGiOh). It's fun that way though~I just think that the two stubborn bastards would make a kawaii yaoi couple. <3 So, in honor of such a fantasy, I am currently working on a piece that includes the two men. It's gonna be a blast!
As for a long, detailed blog entry...that might come later this evening. I still have to run around with Dad on some errands.
Toodles!
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Real and Fake
I'm sure that little boys and girls everywhere are under pressure and are questioning their appearances simply from magazines and what not due to the oh-so perfect looking models and actors/actresses inside. I knew for a long time now that the photos have been Photoshopped or manipulated in some way, but what do the children think? What do the teenagers of today think?
Care to take a peek into this false reality dumped on everyone?
Check this out:
http://www.pixcetera.com/pixcetera/picture-perfect/28931
Care to take a peek into this false reality dumped on everyone?
Check this out:
http://www.pixcetera.com/pixcetera/picture-perfect/28931
In The Road of Today
I am sitting here watching the current tv channel. This is probably one of my most favorite television channels...well, I don't watch much TV anymore, but when I do I'm usually waching channel 366 on DirecTV. Current is just such an inspirational and informal channel. I love watching the lives of other people and the events that are taking place that I never even knew existed. It's just loads of fun. In fact, it seems to keep me company when I am feeling lonely. Haha.
So, I've only been awake for...a little more than an hour. I would have liked to have gotten up earlier, but like yesterday I just layed around in bed awake for a while. My mind was probably wandering or something.
If you scroll down on this page you'll find my slideshow. Thanks to Flickr I have found a decent, simple way to share my art. Yay. Speaking of Flickr...I like its layout and what not a lot better than Photobucket. Photobucket always reminded me of a bucket of...messiness. Too many adds and such. Whereas Flickr - to me - seems cleaner and has a simpler look. Easy on the eyes. Heh!
I am sitting here now to see if my beloved UPS man will be arriving today with my new comic book. I can't wait! I finally bought the book I have been wanting from Amazon.com. It's one that I don't think you can buy in stores or anything; I finally get to read it soon!
The manga is called Stray Crayons by Yoko Molotov. If you go to http://www.yokomolotov.net/ you can see all of her works, including a preview of Stray Crayons.
I absolutely adore Yoko's style! It's just so unique and gorgeous~
Stray Crayons: http://www.yokomolotov.net/indexsc.html <3
Please come today Mr. UPS guy!
So, I've only been awake for...a little more than an hour. I would have liked to have gotten up earlier, but like yesterday I just layed around in bed awake for a while. My mind was probably wandering or something.
If you scroll down on this page you'll find my slideshow. Thanks to Flickr I have found a decent, simple way to share my art. Yay. Speaking of Flickr...I like its layout and what not a lot better than Photobucket. Photobucket always reminded me of a bucket of...messiness. Too many adds and such. Whereas Flickr - to me - seems cleaner and has a simpler look. Easy on the eyes. Heh!
I am sitting here now to see if my beloved UPS man will be arriving today with my new comic book. I can't wait! I finally bought the book I have been wanting from Amazon.com. It's one that I don't think you can buy in stores or anything; I finally get to read it soon!
The manga is called Stray Crayons by Yoko Molotov. If you go to http://www.yokomolotov.net/ you can see all of her works, including a preview of Stray Crayons.
I absolutely adore Yoko's style! It's just so unique and gorgeous~
Stray Crayons: http://www.yokomolotov.net/indexsc.html <3
Please come today Mr. UPS guy!
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Clouds
September 13th was Dad's birthday. It was fun! We ran around town, had a hilarious shopping trip in Khols, continuously laughed at iHop while trying to eat 'breakfast', and a lot of other fun stuff! I'm really glad that Dad had a good time. I love him so much!
My friend Levi from my old high school has been dropping by my place for a visit for the past two days. It's good to see him again since I don't really see anyone anymore. We just hung out like a couple of normal teens: caused 'trouble,' did random stuff, were easily amused, blah dee blah. Yesterday we were trying to jump into a bush from my swing set out back. We declared that it was better than doing pot. Indeed. Hah! We also listened to a bunch of Oomph! and Ramstein to pass the time. Resident Evil was also a big part of our conversations. Apparently there is a new animated movie coming out WITH LEON S. KENNEDY! I seriously 'squeed' like a rabid fangirl when I saw him in the preview. So sexy. Anyways, I believe the movie is called Resident Evil: Degeneration. I can't wait! Levi and I decided that we're going to go see it together when it comes out. Other than that, we're also going to start learning German together as out 'secret language' since everyone else at school is apparently into their Japanese. Haha. Ah, that Levi. He's a great kid.
Clouds.
As I was lying awake in bed this morning I noticed how the light was changing. I knew that there had to be clouds today. I had been wanting to see them for so very long, and, sure enough, beautiful clouds have been festooning our valley sky today. I love it! It really does make the sky seem endless when there are clouds floating along above. I can't get enough of it.
The ocean is where I want to be. I've decided that when I'm ready to be on my own, I'm moving somewhere by the coast. I would absolutely love to have an art studio that overlooks the sea. It would be gorgeous!
Speaking of art studios, the remodeling on our house is going well. The speed is somewhat slow at the moment due to work, but it is coming along nicely. It'll be totally worth the wait in the long run. I plan on turning my new, fresh room into a 1/2 typical teenage bedroom, 1/2 in-home art studio. I don't have a lot of room, but I'll cope. I've already drawn some 'blue prints,' too.
When my room is done...I am totally putting the candle I bought from Levi's fundraiser in there. Ah, the smell of fresh sheets! I hope purchasing that candle will succeed in getting Levi to Europe!
My friend Levi from my old high school has been dropping by my place for a visit for the past two days. It's good to see him again since I don't really see anyone anymore. We just hung out like a couple of normal teens: caused 'trouble,' did random stuff, were easily amused, blah dee blah. Yesterday we were trying to jump into a bush from my swing set out back. We declared that it was better than doing pot. Indeed. Hah! We also listened to a bunch of Oomph! and Ramstein to pass the time. Resident Evil was also a big part of our conversations. Apparently there is a new animated movie coming out WITH LEON S. KENNEDY! I seriously 'squeed' like a rabid fangirl when I saw him in the preview. So sexy. Anyways, I believe the movie is called Resident Evil: Degeneration. I can't wait! Levi and I decided that we're going to go see it together when it comes out. Other than that, we're also going to start learning German together as out 'secret language' since everyone else at school is apparently into their Japanese. Haha. Ah, that Levi. He's a great kid.
Clouds.
As I was lying awake in bed this morning I noticed how the light was changing. I knew that there had to be clouds today. I had been wanting to see them for so very long, and, sure enough, beautiful clouds have been festooning our valley sky today. I love it! It really does make the sky seem endless when there are clouds floating along above. I can't get enough of it.
The ocean is where I want to be. I've decided that when I'm ready to be on my own, I'm moving somewhere by the coast. I would absolutely love to have an art studio that overlooks the sea. It would be gorgeous!
Speaking of art studios, the remodeling on our house is going well. The speed is somewhat slow at the moment due to work, but it is coming along nicely. It'll be totally worth the wait in the long run. I plan on turning my new, fresh room into a 1/2 typical teenage bedroom, 1/2 in-home art studio. I don't have a lot of room, but I'll cope. I've already drawn some 'blue prints,' too.
When my room is done...I am totally putting the candle I bought from Levi's fundraiser in there. Ah, the smell of fresh sheets! I hope purchasing that candle will succeed in getting Levi to Europe!
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Suffer, I Deserve To
Guess what.
Looks like I'm going to be pulling off an all-nighter once again. Due to my horrible skills of managing time and certain events that have been taking place lately, I have really fallen behind in school. It's not terrible, though. Mostly troublesome. This time I promise to manage my time better!
I miss washing the bounce houses. I wonder if uncle Ray will be bringing them by again soon...I hope soooo! I don't care about the money, I just want to have an overdose of fun!
Levi dropped by today and we hung out for a while. It was fun. He wants to learn how to play the keyboard; I bet he'll kick ass if he really dedicates time to it. So, judging by what we talked about and what he told me he seems to be doing well. Which is great!
Oh, geez. I would type more right now and give everyone an overload of updates, but I'm feeling a bit too tired...and I still have a LOT of homework to do.
I deserve to suffer!
Next time I'll post more about what has been going on.
x___x
Looks like I'm going to be pulling off an all-nighter once again. Due to my horrible skills of managing time and certain events that have been taking place lately, I have really fallen behind in school. It's not terrible, though. Mostly troublesome. This time I promise to manage my time better!
I miss washing the bounce houses. I wonder if uncle Ray will be bringing them by again soon...I hope soooo! I don't care about the money, I just want to have an overdose of fun!
Levi dropped by today and we hung out for a while. It was fun. He wants to learn how to play the keyboard; I bet he'll kick ass if he really dedicates time to it. So, judging by what we talked about and what he told me he seems to be doing well. Which is great!
Oh, geez. I would type more right now and give everyone an overload of updates, but I'm feeling a bit too tired...and I still have a LOT of homework to do.
I deserve to suffer!
Next time I'll post more about what has been going on.
x___x
Friday, September 12, 2008
Just Once More
Our sky.
The sky of this valley. So polluted. Every time I see photos of places where the sky is endless...envy consumes me. When I think about the people living under those crystal clear skies, I wish that their wonderland could be my own. Instead, here, a thick sheet of smog and other shit acts as an aggravating barrier, filling our lungs with wretched disgust. If Tori is to never return home, then I hope that he has found clear skies to fly in. I wish for him to have all of the happiness that a bird could possibly posses; I wish for him to find that place which he could truly call his haven. I don't want him to look up at this sky any longer. It has bore its fangs deep within myself. When I was a child, it was just the sky. Nothing more, nothing less. Now I realize how poisonous it really is.
Though it succeeds in placing me in darker moods, I still strive to better myself with all of this free time I now have again. Lately I haven't been doing so, I hate to admit. I don't want to use my last few days of being ill as some sort of mortal excuse. I don't want all of these everlasting thoughts and wishes of her to cause me to hesitate on the path I wish to follow.
I am merely sixteen years young, yet I already feel like I lost that one person who I could truly be happy with. I want her. I don't need her. But I've gotten to the point that where my want for her - for them - is so strong that it seems to have become a need. A necessity for survival. But I do not pray on them like the blood thirsty predator I sometimes see myself as. I am no stalker, nor am I frighteningly obsessed. I just love them dearly. Now my want for them is preying on me, urging me; daring me to reach out to them again. Why? Why do I feel like I need them in my life?
Drawings. Writings. Laughing. Crying.
When I was with them, my life was practically based around them.
I had set this duty upon myself. I wanted to protect them. I wanted to make them happy. I wanted to give them what they wanted, but could not have.
I'm not sure if it was my stubborn side that lead to our friendship's end or my stupidity. Maybe it was their lack in trust for me...despite everything I had done for them, and will still do for them.
I gave them everything I had to offer. I tried so hard to keep us together.
If I hadn't rested my head on her shoulder...if I hadn't scooted so close to comfort her with my words that would later mean nothing...how would things be now?
She was upset. I remember her sister telling me that she would not come down to eat; it had been like that for some time. I had gone upstairs to her, to try and have her come down. The way she felt...about everything...they way she felt about everything just tore me apart.
"I'll always be here for you," I whispered to her. I wanted her to know that, indeed, I would forevermore be by her side.
"Thank you." Her voice. A simple whisper, those words. What I would give to hear it again.
That moment, though short lived, is the one that I shall never ever forget. It's something that keeps me going to this day. Something that I would kill for to experience again.
I want her to see through this blanket of crap that pollutes our sky. I want her to see the endless world that lies before her. I want her to find true happiness.
I want to see her smile, hear her laugh, listen to her voice, and see her beautiful face...just once more. If I can never have her by my side again, then at least let me see her one more time.
The sky of this valley. So polluted. Every time I see photos of places where the sky is endless...envy consumes me. When I think about the people living under those crystal clear skies, I wish that their wonderland could be my own. Instead, here, a thick sheet of smog and other shit acts as an aggravating barrier, filling our lungs with wretched disgust. If Tori is to never return home, then I hope that he has found clear skies to fly in. I wish for him to have all of the happiness that a bird could possibly posses; I wish for him to find that place which he could truly call his haven. I don't want him to look up at this sky any longer. It has bore its fangs deep within myself. When I was a child, it was just the sky. Nothing more, nothing less. Now I realize how poisonous it really is.
Though it succeeds in placing me in darker moods, I still strive to better myself with all of this free time I now have again. Lately I haven't been doing so, I hate to admit. I don't want to use my last few days of being ill as some sort of mortal excuse. I don't want all of these everlasting thoughts and wishes of her to cause me to hesitate on the path I wish to follow.
I am merely sixteen years young, yet I already feel like I lost that one person who I could truly be happy with. I want her. I don't need her. But I've gotten to the point that where my want for her - for them - is so strong that it seems to have become a need. A necessity for survival. But I do not pray on them like the blood thirsty predator I sometimes see myself as. I am no stalker, nor am I frighteningly obsessed. I just love them dearly. Now my want for them is preying on me, urging me; daring me to reach out to them again. Why? Why do I feel like I need them in my life?
Drawings. Writings. Laughing. Crying.
When I was with them, my life was practically based around them.
I had set this duty upon myself. I wanted to protect them. I wanted to make them happy. I wanted to give them what they wanted, but could not have.
I'm not sure if it was my stubborn side that lead to our friendship's end or my stupidity. Maybe it was their lack in trust for me...despite everything I had done for them, and will still do for them.
I gave them everything I had to offer. I tried so hard to keep us together.
If I hadn't rested my head on her shoulder...if I hadn't scooted so close to comfort her with my words that would later mean nothing...how would things be now?
She was upset. I remember her sister telling me that she would not come down to eat; it had been like that for some time. I had gone upstairs to her, to try and have her come down. The way she felt...about everything...they way she felt about everything just tore me apart.
"I'll always be here for you," I whispered to her. I wanted her to know that, indeed, I would forevermore be by her side.
"Thank you." Her voice. A simple whisper, those words. What I would give to hear it again.
That moment, though short lived, is the one that I shall never ever forget. It's something that keeps me going to this day. Something that I would kill for to experience again.
I want her to see through this blanket of crap that pollutes our sky. I want her to see the endless world that lies before her. I want her to find true happiness.
I want to see her smile, hear her laugh, listen to her voice, and see her beautiful face...just once more. If I can never have her by my side again, then at least let me see her one more time.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Something Short
I really hope we find Tori.
One of my Mom's birds went missing this morning. Somehow one of the doors on Tori's pen was pushed open. No one knows how...but he hasn't come home yet. I really miss him...he was such a sweet little bird.
Other than that,
I think everything is okay. Tori's disappearance isn't treating me (and everyone) very well.
But today was...normal, I guess. Or beyond what anyone else could call normal. Normal to me, I guess.
I saw Mr. Goat and Bambi a lot more today. I'm glad I get to feed and talk to them, even though they don't understand a word I'm saying. But who knows? Maybe they do.
Drawing
has seemed to come back a little. I've been trying to at least sketch something everyday. Seeing that I am getting over this illness (Poor Hay is catching it), I'll be able to go about my normal activities. I really want to drum...beating the shit out of something sounds like a delicious idea at the moment. I just want to drown myself out from this world.
I don't really have anything else to say, I think.
One of my Mom's birds went missing this morning. Somehow one of the doors on Tori's pen was pushed open. No one knows how...but he hasn't come home yet. I really miss him...he was such a sweet little bird.
Other than that,
I think everything is okay. Tori's disappearance isn't treating me (and everyone) very well.
But today was...normal, I guess. Or beyond what anyone else could call normal. Normal to me, I guess.
I saw Mr. Goat and Bambi a lot more today. I'm glad I get to feed and talk to them, even though they don't understand a word I'm saying. But who knows? Maybe they do.
Drawing
has seemed to come back a little. I've been trying to at least sketch something everyday. Seeing that I am getting over this illness (Poor Hay is catching it), I'll be able to go about my normal activities. I really want to drum...beating the shit out of something sounds like a delicious idea at the moment. I just want to drown myself out from this world.
I don't really have anything else to say, I think.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Melancholy
What's new?
I don't even know what to type as a blog entry tonight.
So why do I bother? I guess I just feel like ranting...or something.
Mr. Goat is doing well, I think. I fed him a few more times today. He knows now when to come to me. I love you, Mr. Goat. He also has a little friend I like to call Bambi. Bambi is an adorable little guy with chocolate colored fur and a black stripe running down his back. They both have their adorable traits!
/) /)
(o.o)
(><)o <--- OMG It's a bunny! ()======{::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::/ <--- ZOMG! It's a sword! As you can tell, I - in fact - have NO idea what to rant about.
I think it's because I feel somewhat....melancholy.
PLAY THIS GAME!
I don't even know what to type as a blog entry tonight.
So why do I bother? I guess I just feel like ranting...or something.
Mr. Goat is doing well, I think. I fed him a few more times today. He knows now when to come to me. I love you, Mr. Goat. He also has a little friend I like to call Bambi. Bambi is an adorable little guy with chocolate colored fur and a black stripe running down his back. They both have their adorable traits!
/) /)
(o.o)
(><)o <--- OMG It's a bunny! ()======{::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::/ <--- ZOMG! It's a sword! As you can tell, I - in fact - have NO idea what to rant about.
I think it's because I feel somewhat....melancholy.
PLAY THIS GAME!
 | Mad Monday - Force other vehicles off the road |
Fire Hazard
Dreams again.
Various people. Various situations.
I don't remember any of them too well, but I do remember seeing gorgeous artwork in one. Hah!
I also remember seeing my cousin Derick...and not being able to reach him or something. I remember the twins...but maybe they weren't in any of my dreams. I was just thinking about them all night before I had fallen asleep. Then somebody stole my suitcase after it had arrived late and I started to hunt that bastard down! Then suddenly I was learning how to say 'monkey' in Spanish. ...Yeah.
Different kind of feeling.
I'm still sick. Yay. But ever since before I fell asleep last night and leading up to now, I've had this strange feeling inside of me. Hell, I think it was from sometime earlier last night to now. It's that feeling of "everything is going to be okay." Or something similar, at least. I am going to blame Sladerrrr and Giselle and Derek for giving me this warm and happy feeling.
Giselle said she got on Gmail just to talk to me. We didn't argue like we sometimes would, either. Instead, we had a conversation just like we used to before we had "gone our seperate ways." It was a fun, too! Full of lol's and xD's and what not. It was really good to hear from that girl again.
Slade is just always nice to me. He's always understanding. Has a good sense of humor, too. He let me hear a recording of him singing (he felt so humiliated. Haha!). And I tell you, his voice just made me feel so relaxed and calm. Made me feel happy. I swear, his voice is breathtaking. I need to call and force him to sing over the phone! Haha! But, really, he's a breathtaking young man inside and out. I love him to death.
Derek, thanks for always talking to me. You're one humorous guy. I really appreciate you saying "good morning" to me every day. Let's me know that I have someone there to pester and frighten. Oh, the joy! You're a great guy! I don't feel so lonely anymore because you talk to me all day, every day. Hah! So thanks a million for that, man.
This morning,
I just felt like typing a little something. I've got some stuff on my mind. I seriously love the people mentioned above, too. They're all such funny bunnies! Hehe.
I'll probalby be posting again later today/tongiht, just to filter my mind again. Or just to rant! Who knows?
Well,
T T F N
EDIT:
Mr. Goat. (Or Miss. I haven't checked).
There's this bug-eyed, black goat on the other side of the fence. Poor thing has to live at my neighbors hideous home. Yesterday it was "following" me. Every time I turned around, there were its huge, golden brown eyes staring at me. Creepy. I have a goat stalker. I saw him this morning and decided to get changed and go visit. After doing so, I found him and started to pull a bunch of overgrown grass out of the ground to feed him. As I was sneaking it to the other side of the fence in small piles, I would sort of talk to Mr. Goat. He is so adorable! And creepy...
Various people. Various situations.
I don't remember any of them too well, but I do remember seeing gorgeous artwork in one. Hah!
I also remember seeing my cousin Derick...and not being able to reach him or something. I remember the twins...but maybe they weren't in any of my dreams. I was just thinking about them all night before I had fallen asleep. Then somebody stole my suitcase after it had arrived late and I started to hunt that bastard down! Then suddenly I was learning how to say 'monkey' in Spanish. ...Yeah.
Different kind of feeling.
I'm still sick. Yay. But ever since before I fell asleep last night and leading up to now, I've had this strange feeling inside of me. Hell, I think it was from sometime earlier last night to now. It's that feeling of "everything is going to be okay." Or something similar, at least. I am going to blame Sladerrrr and Giselle and Derek for giving me this warm and happy feeling.
Giselle said she got on Gmail just to talk to me. We didn't argue like we sometimes would, either. Instead, we had a conversation just like we used to before we had "gone our seperate ways." It was a fun, too! Full of lol's and xD's and what not. It was really good to hear from that girl again.
Slade is just always nice to me. He's always understanding. Has a good sense of humor, too. He let me hear a recording of him singing (he felt so humiliated. Haha!). And I tell you, his voice just made me feel so relaxed and calm. Made me feel happy. I swear, his voice is breathtaking. I need to call and force him to sing over the phone! Haha! But, really, he's a breathtaking young man inside and out. I love him to death.
Derek, thanks for always talking to me. You're one humorous guy. I really appreciate you saying "good morning" to me every day. Let's me know that I have someone there to pester and frighten. Oh, the joy! You're a great guy! I don't feel so lonely anymore because you talk to me all day, every day. Hah! So thanks a million for that, man.
This morning,
I just felt like typing a little something. I've got some stuff on my mind. I seriously love the people mentioned above, too. They're all such funny bunnies! Hehe.
I'll probalby be posting again later today/tongiht, just to filter my mind again. Or just to rant! Who knows?
Well,
T T F N
EDIT:
Mr. Goat. (Or Miss. I haven't checked).
There's this bug-eyed, black goat on the other side of the fence. Poor thing has to live at my neighbors hideous home. Yesterday it was "following" me. Every time I turned around, there were its huge, golden brown eyes staring at me. Creepy. I have a goat stalker. I saw him this morning and decided to get changed and go visit. After doing so, I found him and started to pull a bunch of overgrown grass out of the ground to feed him. As I was sneaking it to the other side of the fence in small piles, I would sort of talk to Mr. Goat. He is so adorable! And creepy...
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Go Away, Kitty
These cats are annoying me.
I love Fin and Chin to death, but their cuteness and curiosity is getting on my nerves! Well, Fin is just relaxing with Hay in the living room...but Chin keeps exploring our desk. I had to throw some bottle caps on the bathroom floor to get him to go away.Don't get me wrong, though. I love the little bastards.
Besides that,
I. Drew. Something!
Like, OMG, right!?
I'm so happy that I actually drew something today. It keeps my sanity in check, that's for sure. I still have an ass load of improving to do, but I'll get where I want to be eventually. I'll share with you all - or to whoever actually reads this godforsaken blog (I love you Derek and J) - what I had come up with today.
This is Grim.
Grim is a "bad boy", stubborn, over confident, independent, smart ass. Among other traits and qualities. But, yes. Meet Grim. Grim, meet your viewers.
If you want to view this image in it's original size, just click the link below. Then click the picture again on the page that comes up to see it in full view mode. (Edit: Or, hell, just click the picture itself on THIS page if you want. Haha!)
I love Fin and Chin to death, but their cuteness and curiosity is getting on my nerves! Well, Fin is just relaxing with Hay in the living room...but Chin keeps exploring our desk. I had to throw some bottle caps on the bathroom floor to get him to go away.Don't get me wrong, though. I love the little bastards.
Besides that,
I. Drew. Something!
Like, OMG, right!?
I'm so happy that I actually drew something today. It keeps my sanity in check, that's for sure. I still have an ass load of improving to do, but I'll get where I want to be eventually. I'll share with you all - or to whoever actually reads this godforsaken blog (I love you Derek and J) - what I had come up with today.
This is Grim.
Grim is a "bad boy", stubborn, over confident, independent, smart ass. Among other traits and qualities. But, yes. Meet Grim. Grim, meet your viewers.
If you want to view this image in it's original size, just click the link below. Then click the picture again on the page that comes up to see it in full view mode. (Edit: Or, hell, just click the picture itself on THIS page if you want. Haha!)
Monday, September 8, 2008
Cranberry Juice Doesn't Expire?
I feel like S H I T. But it's funny as hell, so I can't complain!
I got some sort of sickness the other day. You know. The kind that makes you all stuffy and it's hard to breathe. Yeah, whatever the heck that is.
Like I said, I can't complain. It'll go away soon enough.
Anywho,
that's why I haven't been updating my blog lately. Or I'm just lazy. Take your pick.
I haven't been drawing a lot lately either. It's been this way for about a year now. It depresses me sometimes...since drawing is my life. Haha! I need to dig out that new art book I bought and start reading it.
Actually, what I REALLY need to do is hit the books. I've already fallen far behind in homework. It's my own damn fault, though. I need to manage my time better.
I haven't been practicing as much either. Hell, I don't even know if I'll be able to make it to drum lessons tomorrow. And that would mean no Phil! It's sad to think about...heh.
You know, every time something happens that has to deal with them I go on a total "shut down" for at least forty-six hours. That's just an estimate, but you get my point. I've drilled them down so far into my heart that letting them go is pretty much impossible. Not a day goes by without me wondering how they are.
I heard that my other friend was in the hospital for a couple of days. She had some sort of surgery...we don't really talk much anymore, so I don't get updated about her life too often. I just hope that she is doing well.
I miss everyone though. And by everyone, I mean EVERYONE (and everything). My friends, my teachers, people I never even knew, the hallways, the classrooms, having to carry a backpack around, sitting through dull lectures, playing tennis and then later hearing a certain someone say that I looked cute screwing off on the court. Hah!
I miss the arguments. Because after each one, everything would be okay again. Then I had blinded myself; and I abandoned her. I ran away. I can't even describe how much I hate myself for doing so...that's why I need to make it up to them. Somehow...
But I cannot linger on this forever, can I?
I mean, I have my entire life left to jack up! It's gonna be great!
Even without them by my side like they had always been, I can move on with a smile on my lips and my chin held high. Besides, they'll always be in my heart. I'll always find my way back to them.
So I guess caring about them oh-so much makes me a terrible, selfish person.
Nah. I care about everyone. Well, I can be terrible and selfish. I won't deny that. But, truly, I care for everyone. I'll find my way back to them, too.
Perhaps soon I'll get my inspiration back to draw.
I'll try out some other hobbies and broaden my horizons a little. Just need to give this artists' block some time to re-evaporate.
I've literally got an ass load of ideas, but when I sit down to start drawing them...I "die."
Hmm...I wonder when Kev will be able to play EverQuest. I'll kick his sorry behind for always mocking me! HAHA!
Looove you Keeeevy. <3
I got some sort of sickness the other day. You know. The kind that makes you all stuffy and it's hard to breathe. Yeah, whatever the heck that is.
Like I said, I can't complain. It'll go away soon enough.
Anywho,
that's why I haven't been updating my blog lately. Or I'm just lazy. Take your pick.
I haven't been drawing a lot lately either. It's been this way for about a year now. It depresses me sometimes...since drawing is my life. Haha! I need to dig out that new art book I bought and start reading it.
Actually, what I REALLY need to do is hit the books. I've already fallen far behind in homework. It's my own damn fault, though. I need to manage my time better.
I haven't been practicing as much either. Hell, I don't even know if I'll be able to make it to drum lessons tomorrow. And that would mean no Phil! It's sad to think about...heh.
You know, every time something happens that has to deal with them I go on a total "shut down" for at least forty-six hours. That's just an estimate, but you get my point. I've drilled them down so far into my heart that letting them go is pretty much impossible. Not a day goes by without me wondering how they are.
I heard that my other friend was in the hospital for a couple of days. She had some sort of surgery...we don't really talk much anymore, so I don't get updated about her life too often. I just hope that she is doing well.
I miss everyone though. And by everyone, I mean EVERYONE (and everything). My friends, my teachers, people I never even knew, the hallways, the classrooms, having to carry a backpack around, sitting through dull lectures, playing tennis and then later hearing a certain someone say that I looked cute screwing off on the court. Hah!
I miss the arguments. Because after each one, everything would be okay again. Then I had blinded myself; and I abandoned her. I ran away. I can't even describe how much I hate myself for doing so...that's why I need to make it up to them. Somehow...
But I cannot linger on this forever, can I?
I mean, I have my entire life left to jack up! It's gonna be great!
Even without them by my side like they had always been, I can move on with a smile on my lips and my chin held high. Besides, they'll always be in my heart. I'll always find my way back to them.
So I guess caring about them oh-so much makes me a terrible, selfish person.
Nah. I care about everyone. Well, I can be terrible and selfish. I won't deny that. But, truly, I care for everyone. I'll find my way back to them, too.
Perhaps soon I'll get my inspiration back to draw.
I'll try out some other hobbies and broaden my horizons a little. Just need to give this artists' block some time to re-evaporate.
I've literally got an ass load of ideas, but when I sit down to start drawing them...I "die."
Hmm...I wonder when Kev will be able to play EverQuest. I'll kick his sorry behind for always mocking me! HAHA!
Looove you Keeeevy. <3
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Ignoring Common Knowledge
I knew this would happen.
I knew I'd get this sick, pathetic feeling. It hurts so much to think right now. How could I be so bloody stupid?
My feelings are still unbelievably strong for two certain someones. It's honestly insane. They hate my guts and want me dead, yet I just want to be their friend; I love them to death.
I sometimes have to ask myself "What the hell even went wrong?"
Really, though. What DID go wrong?
I can't let go. That's crystal clear, bright as day. Is it because I'm weak or because I care for them at dangerous levels?
Why did I act like they weren't there? Even though I would get into a conversation and laugh with my friends, my mind would often wander. I would think to myself:
"How do I say hello to them?"
"They hate me."
"They want nothing to do with me."
"What the hell do I do?"
My weakness is that I care too much.
I tried to find them when the morning bell rang. I waited for them after school. I saw them. I waited. They walked right past me without a word; without a glance. I should have said something. Anything. When they disappeared I started to walk down the road, still trying to find them.
I'm still chasing after something I can not reach.
I just want to curl up and block everything off.
You know what? I am so fucking selfish. I am a bitter bitch.
I have all of these wonderful friends that I love to death, yet I still mourn over losing THEM. I'm so fucking selfish...
What brought a smile to my face,
I got to see Micheal again. He practically ran over to see me. He always manages to make me so happy. I don't know how...when things were difficult he would listen to me and he was so very understanding. I remember the time when he wouldn't let me out of his sight until I was safe in my classroom. He was worried about me...and I just left days later because of a stupid little quarrel. I already miss him so much.
I got to see Holly and Karolyn and Misty and Jessica and Tristan and Katie and Nick and Steven and so on and so forth. They all brought a smile to face. They're all so wonderful!
Levi certainly made my day, too. He let me visit and we hung out together. It was fun! I think I'm going to write/type a whole separate entry on that story when I'm not feeling so terrible. So expect a full report on that tomorrow!
I have to go.
I knew I'd get this sick, pathetic feeling. It hurts so much to think right now. How could I be so bloody stupid?
My feelings are still unbelievably strong for two certain someones. It's honestly insane. They hate my guts and want me dead, yet I just want to be their friend; I love them to death.
I sometimes have to ask myself "What the hell even went wrong?"
Really, though. What DID go wrong?
I can't let go. That's crystal clear, bright as day. Is it because I'm weak or because I care for them at dangerous levels?
Why did I act like they weren't there? Even though I would get into a conversation and laugh with my friends, my mind would often wander. I would think to myself:
"How do I say hello to them?"
"They hate me."
"They want nothing to do with me."
"What the hell do I do?"
My weakness is that I care too much.
I tried to find them when the morning bell rang. I waited for them after school. I saw them. I waited. They walked right past me without a word; without a glance. I should have said something. Anything. When they disappeared I started to walk down the road, still trying to find them.
I'm still chasing after something I can not reach.
I just want to curl up and block everything off.
You know what? I am so fucking selfish. I am a bitter bitch.
I have all of these wonderful friends that I love to death, yet I still mourn over losing THEM. I'm so fucking selfish...
What brought a smile to my face,
I got to see Micheal again. He practically ran over to see me. He always manages to make me so happy. I don't know how...when things were difficult he would listen to me and he was so very understanding. I remember the time when he wouldn't let me out of his sight until I was safe in my classroom. He was worried about me...and I just left days later because of a stupid little quarrel. I already miss him so much.
I got to see Holly and Karolyn and Misty and Jessica and Tristan and Katie and Nick and Steven and so on and so forth. They all brought a smile to face. They're all so wonderful!
Levi certainly made my day, too. He let me visit and we hung out together. It was fun! I think I'm going to write/type a whole separate entry on that story when I'm not feeling so terrible. So expect a full report on that tomorrow!
I have to go.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
I Kissed A Girl
No. I did not kiss anyone.
But now I can safely! HAH!
In other words...my braces are OFF. GONE. Hysterical laughter just consumes me!
I have to wear these dumb retainers, but at least they're rainbow. Rainbow is hot!
Ahem,
So, yeah, first thing in the morning: DENTIST. Oh, joy.
But I did get to go with Grandma everywhere. It was crazy; tiring too. She needed to run some errands, so of course I tagged along.
The usual events occurred today basically:
> Did some more sanding
> Practiced drumming
> Watered the plants
> Blah, blah.
Wow. I am so terribly dull tonight. My writing literally went KERPLUNK.
Lots of capitalized words, though...
Hah!
Sexuality-wise:
I think...I am leaning more towards the lesbian side. I mean, come on, girls are just so cute!
But, then again, I'm still somewhat attracted to boys. Somewhat...
Hmm.
That was out of the blue, wasn't it?
It's official. I'm still just bi. Haha!
I really...can't write/type at the moment...and I was all pumped up to go all out tonight!
Heh
DENTIST ADVENTURE
.Got a cavity filled. (I DO keep my teeth brushed and cleaned!)
.Didn't get numbed all of the way.
.Looked like a Predator because of the 'rubber dam' they stuck in my mouth.
.Did a lot of impressions.
.Neck was sore.
.Legs are sore.
.Had fun though because the people who work there are REALLY nice!.
the END
But now I can safely! HAH!
In other words...my braces are OFF. GONE. Hysterical laughter just consumes me!
I have to wear these dumb retainers, but at least they're rainbow. Rainbow is hot!
Ahem,
So, yeah, first thing in the morning: DENTIST. Oh, joy.
But I did get to go with Grandma everywhere. It was crazy; tiring too. She needed to run some errands, so of course I tagged along.
The usual events occurred today basically:
> Did some more sanding
> Practiced drumming
> Watered the plants
> Blah, blah.
Wow. I am so terribly dull tonight. My writing literally went KERPLUNK.
Lots of capitalized words, though...
Hah!
Sexuality-wise:
I think...I am leaning more towards the lesbian side. I mean, come on, girls are just so cute!
But, then again, I'm still somewhat attracted to boys. Somewhat...
Hmm.
That was out of the blue, wasn't it?
It's official. I'm still just bi. Haha!
I really...can't write/type at the moment...and I was all pumped up to go all out tonight!
Heh
DENTIST ADVENTURE
.Got a cavity filled. (I DO keep my teeth brushed and cleaned!)
.Didn't get numbed all of the way.
.Looked like a Predator because of the 'rubber dam' they stuck in my mouth.
.Did a lot of impressions.
.Neck was sore.
.Legs are sore.
.Had fun though because the people who work there are REALLY nice!.
the END
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Wood Working
Shame on me!
I didn't post the events of yesterday. Guess I'll have to tell the tale now, eh? :P
Yesterday was far more eventful than the past few days before it. I got to get out of the house again, study human nature at Home Depot and Lowes, and a lot more!
First, I woke up. Amazing right? Then, after sitting around and playing a little bit of 2moons to wake myself up (more like trying to get the game to work properly), Dad appeared in the doorway asking me if I wanted to go to Home Depot with him to gather up some materials. He also threw in that adorable whiny voice of his, which wasn't needed because I always jump at the opportunity to explore the department stores with him. Haha! He's great fun to be around.
So, after fixing up a pile of cardboard, we were off! And the adventure began.
(About the cardboard: my family has been saving any and all kinds of recycable cardboard to, well, recycle. We're saving the world! Believe it or not, recycling that stuff actually makes your garbage amount decrease by a LOT. I highly suggest that everyone who reads this should start recycling cardboard and saving the Earth!)
It was stupidly crowded at Home Depot.
And the cart thing we had was a bitch to steer. It was a crack up though! After waddling around for about half an hour or so, we didn't find what we really needed other than brushes, shims, those paint roller cover things, blah, blah. So, Dad decided to just put everything back and go to Lowes.
Lowes was a bit less crowded than Home Depot, somewhat. The cart thing we had there made a ton of racket! It was rediculous! Dad eventually just made me park it somewhere while we looked for what we needed. Still, we couldn't find the type of boards we needed. So, screw it, we're making our own! Hah! We got ourselves two huge pieces of wood (I can't recall what they were called) and hauled the heavy bastards outside. I waited for Dad to bring the truck around and we moved the boards into the truck bed. Yes, heavy bastards. But, success! We finally got what we needed! I also found a sample paint card that I might use for my room~Yay!
On the way home we got some In'n'Out Burger and Starbucks for the women back at home.
Then came even more delightful work and fun.
We cut up the boards to the sizes we needed and I sanded the edges of the shelves (there's still a lot more to do today!). Dad made most of the calculations while my hands were getting used to gripping the sander. Compared to Dad's, my hands are puny. Darn my female anatomy! It was great fun though.
After some of the shelves were cut and sanded, we headed to Hay's closet where I got to use the nail gun! Damn right I got to use that thing...Haha. I had been wearing a mask, goggles, and ear plugs the whole time, so when I took that stuff off, the nail gun hella made me jump when it went off. When I first used it, my ear plugs kept me from taking in the whole effect of the BAM! I couldn't help but jump at the sound of that loud thing. Crazy!
Finally, our dusty selves called it quits for the night. Dinner was almost done! And it was delicious.
I wasn't off the hook yet. But I can't complain, because I enjoy watering and feeding the animals. Hehe
Today we'll try to do some more of the shelving and sanding and cutting depending on what time Dad gets home from work. I'm thinking about going out to the shop myself to start sanding a little before I take a shower to get ready for drum lessons.
Also, to lead this entry to its end, I'm trying to start a routine. My sister rolled her eyes at me stating that Mom and I always do stuff like this. Well excuse me for trying to manage my time better! I have a written schedule (more like a rough draft) so that I can remind myself to try and adjust to it. If it doesn't work out comfortably, I'll tweak it here and there. I'm just sick of waking up day to day feeling unaccomplished I guess. Haha! Living the life I am now, it's so strange. There's not as much moving around or human contact. I'll take this time to do what I love!
I'll probably be posting again later today. Or I'll just edit this entry. I don't know yet. >P
I didn't post the events of yesterday. Guess I'll have to tell the tale now, eh? :P
Yesterday was far more eventful than the past few days before it. I got to get out of the house again, study human nature at Home Depot and Lowes, and a lot more!
First, I woke up. Amazing right? Then, after sitting around and playing a little bit of 2moons to wake myself up (more like trying to get the game to work properly), Dad appeared in the doorway asking me if I wanted to go to Home Depot with him to gather up some materials. He also threw in that adorable whiny voice of his, which wasn't needed because I always jump at the opportunity to explore the department stores with him. Haha! He's great fun to be around.
So, after fixing up a pile of cardboard, we were off! And the adventure began.
(About the cardboard: my family has been saving any and all kinds of recycable cardboard to, well, recycle. We're saving the world! Believe it or not, recycling that stuff actually makes your garbage amount decrease by a LOT. I highly suggest that everyone who reads this should start recycling cardboard and saving the Earth!)
It was stupidly crowded at Home Depot.
And the cart thing we had was a bitch to steer. It was a crack up though! After waddling around for about half an hour or so, we didn't find what we really needed other than brushes, shims, those paint roller cover things, blah, blah. So, Dad decided to just put everything back and go to Lowes.
Lowes was a bit less crowded than Home Depot, somewhat. The cart thing we had there made a ton of racket! It was rediculous! Dad eventually just made me park it somewhere while we looked for what we needed. Still, we couldn't find the type of boards we needed. So, screw it, we're making our own! Hah! We got ourselves two huge pieces of wood (I can't recall what they were called) and hauled the heavy bastards outside. I waited for Dad to bring the truck around and we moved the boards into the truck bed. Yes, heavy bastards. But, success! We finally got what we needed! I also found a sample paint card that I might use for my room~Yay!
On the way home we got some In'n'Out Burger and Starbucks for the women back at home.
Then came even more delightful work and fun.
We cut up the boards to the sizes we needed and I sanded the edges of the shelves (there's still a lot more to do today!). Dad made most of the calculations while my hands were getting used to gripping the sander. Compared to Dad's, my hands are puny. Darn my female anatomy! It was great fun though.
After some of the shelves were cut and sanded, we headed to Hay's closet where I got to use the nail gun! Damn right I got to use that thing...Haha. I had been wearing a mask, goggles, and ear plugs the whole time, so when I took that stuff off, the nail gun hella made me jump when it went off. When I first used it, my ear plugs kept me from taking in the whole effect of the BAM! I couldn't help but jump at the sound of that loud thing. Crazy!
Finally, our dusty selves called it quits for the night. Dinner was almost done! And it was delicious.
I wasn't off the hook yet. But I can't complain, because I enjoy watering and feeding the animals. Hehe
Today we'll try to do some more of the shelving and sanding and cutting depending on what time Dad gets home from work. I'm thinking about going out to the shop myself to start sanding a little before I take a shower to get ready for drum lessons.
Also, to lead this entry to its end, I'm trying to start a routine. My sister rolled her eyes at me stating that Mom and I always do stuff like this. Well excuse me for trying to manage my time better! I have a written schedule (more like a rough draft) so that I can remind myself to try and adjust to it. If it doesn't work out comfortably, I'll tweak it here and there. I'm just sick of waking up day to day feeling unaccomplished I guess. Haha! Living the life I am now, it's so strange. There's not as much moving around or human contact. I'll take this time to do what I love!
I'll probably be posting again later today. Or I'll just edit this entry. I don't know yet. >P
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